Undread of the Shower

The Shower Holds No Fear for Al

Al Levi shares a story from The Mighty.

This is an experience of a different kind in which the mind has been tamed.

Al cites Psychologists Matthew Killingsworth and Daniel Gilbert of Harvard University. They believe that “a human mind is a wandering mind, and a wandering mind is an unhappy mind.”

This is what we found out about Libby in the previous shower blog.

Just about 50% of our waking hours are taken up with mind wandering.

Believe it or not, this figure includes daydreaming. Daydreaming often leads to negative thoughts because they have to do with the past or the future, not the present moment.


I have said it elsewhere: Your thoughts are not you, they are the mind raising them up to your consciousness.


So when you have a shower next, try and use all your senses in those moments, each one new and different from the last.

I like lists. Here’s one for showering:

  • Feel the temperature of the water, name it
  • Listen to the sound of the pulsing water, describe it
  • Let the shower run over your face, open your mouth …
  • Sense the play of water in the different places on your body
  • Sing or recite
  • Compare the rough flannel to hand lathering
  • Smell the fragrance of soap, gel, water
  • Keep going – think of some yourself

I kept the experience going when I toweled myself after my shower.

But now I take time and dry myself very slowly, or even sensuously, loving that I don’t need to hurry or worry.



When I was working full-time, my wash in the morning was as fast as I could make it (three other people needing the bathroom after me)

In my head I was going over things I needed to remember to take with me, what order I was going to teach my lessons that day, lunch money for the girls, getting something out of the freezer for evening meal, worrying about the so-called “friend” who was giving my daughter a hard time, asking the old ladies next door to take in a parcel and so on.

What of my needs? There was no room for them.

And when I got to school early, I hit the floor running. I won’t bore you with what.

This was part of the reason I burnt out.

Now I am retired, I can look after myself properly. Whereas some of my colleagues are as busy now as before. They are looking after ancient parents, doing lengthy babysitting for their grand- children (fun but exhausting), some have taken on other jobs. It was worth all the grinding years to earn the time to do this blog and other activities I wanted to do while I am still healthy.

I am trusting to Mindfulness to keep me from crashing and burning ever again.

Back to the Shower


Bloody News Stops Mindfulness Exercise

 More news is a bad thing  for your mood

I have been working on this blog so long and hard, I have forgotten to eat. Not very mindful. I also used to log on to the BBC national news and skim. Something terrifying usually headlines and the rest is not often news at all. Someone gives birth in the taxi or schoolchildren have fundraised and then a paragraph about twitter or Tesco. Big whoop! But I have dispensed with that in favor of blogging at 6 am.


You know what? I actually feel better not seeing the news at all. Politics have always been lost on me because I am not a citizen of the UK nor will I ever be. And I cannot bear the latest Trumpism. I am ashamed of my fellow Americans for voting in that loofah-faced shit gibbon (not my words, honest). I am remembering family mealtimes. Our two girls were ages 7 and 3. I don’t remember when news at meals began. Suddenly I realized that they were watching the latest atrocities and ‘eating up’ the gory details –  it was the Falklands War (after all, I think Argentina is buying it back – tell that to the families of fallen soldiers!) As for my husband and children, the association of food and violence and eating I simply couldn’t bear. And the food I had cooked from scratch after a hard day at the chalk face they were not even savoring I put my foot down and cut out the TV. We do not possess a TV at all now. We couldn’t get rid of it entirely because we couldn’t get babysitters without it. My point is this. News depresses viewers. It has been studied and proven. Why watch? All of is not technically news anymore as it had already happened. I certainly would not watch more than once a day. Same with newspapers.   Positive News Journal  is an antidote to the normal news Sites.                    


 So there have sprung up news sites which publish positive news. YES!!  

Good News Network


U.K. Carbon Emissions Fall to Levels From 1894     I did not know this.




Beginner’s Mind can be scary! This news interests me.


Check out some good news and see if it doesn’t lift your spirits:

Here is a video news item. I was afraid of what the newscaster was going to say. Police get such a bad name:     https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kz7Tl1Q7SiY


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Dread of getting in the Shower can be eased with Mindfulness meditation exercise

Fear or Dread of the shower can be eased with Mindfulness

Hello fellow bloggers and Mindfulness peeps,

This situation is driving me bonkers. The revered Smithsonian Magazine keeps sending me renewal forms when I have already paid. As it is we were getting two copies monthly after the balls-up they made the last time I dealt with them. I fear they will send three copies at a time. The local doctors’ and dentists’ offices will be flooded with them. Does this happen to you?


the reason I am telling this because I went on the Smithsonian site and I saw articles flashing past. One was entitled, “Why Mind Wandering Can Be So Miserable, According to Happiness Experts” by one of their staffers, Libby Copeland. She is gloomy and anxious at the prospect of a shower. It sounds silly but maybe you can think of something you are irrationally afraid of. Libby is ripe for some Mindfulness training.

Mindfulness helps to help a woman afraid of the shower



The article, written by a skeptic, concerns the times in our daily lives when we realize that the mind is trying, usually ineffectually, to deal with matters beyond our control. Some of your multitasking is easy (remember to post that birthday card for your sister) other problems seem to have no solution (if your mother needs a care package). Or a past thought might be,” I know she doesn’t like me because…”This is Unmindfulness. You cannot do anything about these things at the moment.

If you are driving your car, you will not remember any scenery or landmarks because you are never aware of your ‘present.’ You skipped past the buzzard hanging in the sky, the yellow gorse flowers persisting even in the coldest weather, the sign for the plowing contest next week and so on… This attention in the moment is Mindfulness.



Mindfulness helps us to notice things in the moment. Gorse flowers smell like coconut

Gorse flowers smell like coconut.


The scientists say that we spend 47% of our waking hours mind-wandering. Nearly half! I know my mind drifts off even when I am watching a movie thriller. I also know I used to be much worse when I was working a primary school teacher. I hardly ever got jobs done to my satisfaction. Then the tendency is to beat yourself up about it and say what a loser you are.


You will be interested to know that we pay most attention (I.e., showing Mindfulness) during sex. We spend the most time – 67% – in grooming behaviors.


WANDERING IS WHAT MINDS DO. (Take this to heart)

So what about poor Libby? She knew that when she got in the shower, all her worst fears and worries would boil up. It had become a habit and so she hated showering. I think that is too bad because of showers, except for baths, are the most calming, Mindfulness expressing things we can do for ourselves. Sometime I will have to try out my disco spinning lights gadget my daughter gave me for Christmas. Promise you won’t put tea lights around your bath!


Well, with anxious apprehension, Libby stepped into the shower. She kept her attention on her breathing and felt different.

“As she says,  the trick is in recognizing the illusion—

“‘ah yes, there’s that ridiculous clown car of anxiety coming down the road again.

The saving grace, when I can manage to focus, is the present moment. ”


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